As Tabby (strange name, I know) put her two young children down for an afternoon nap in her double-wide trailer in rural New England, she decided to take the quiet time to do some laundry in the back room that also acted as a writing office for her husband, an aspiring novelist.
Her husband was the sole breadwinner of the family working jobs as a high school teacher and a laundromat attendant. But he dreamed of being able to, one day, quit those jobs and write full time.
However after years of pounding away at his typewriter, he was becoming disheartened. Thinking he was never going to make it as a writer and tired of spending his life in a cramped trailer, he was considering giving up on that dream.
While she was putting in a load of whites, Tabby noticed a few balled up pieces of paper in the trash can next to the dryer. She smoothed out the pages and was astonished by what she read.
When her husband came home that night, she confronted him about what she had found..
“This is incredible. This could be the best thing you’ve ever written,” she exclaimed.
But her husband wasn’t convinced.
“I don’t know. I don’t really understand the subject matter and I just can’t make it hold together.”
After a night of conversation she not only convinced her husband to keep going on the story, she assured him that she would help. Essentially co-writing it with him.
And this is the story of how Tabby and her husband, Stephen King, wrote “Carrie”, the first in a series of horror and other novels by one of the most prolific and popular authors of the past 50 years.
There is something romantic about going at it alone.
Of being the lone wolf. Of being that person who, against all the odds, toils in isolation to ultimately emerge with great success.
We see it in the movie “The Pursuit of Happyness”. Will Smith’s character, with seemingly no outside help, goes from a homeless single father to a high paying Wall Street broker.
We see it in Bukowski’s poem “Go All The Way” where he lists all the pains you will go through when trying to accomplish what seems a nearly impossible task.
Not eating for days. Sleeping on a park bench. Going to jail. Derision. Mockery.
And then he gets to “isolation” and changes heart. “Isolation,” he claims, “is a gift”.
And this notion - the one of not needing anyone else in order to succeed - works very well in poetry and movies and all manner of creative endeavors meant to inspire.
But it doesn’t really work well in actual life.
No. Most people who actually succeed do so with lots of support.
You probably don’t realize how many really important decisions you make in your life are tied into the network and support system that accompany them. Going into the military, which college you choose, which corporation you join and who you marry are all examples of networks that you actively join and deeply shape the rest of your days.
Yet, when it comes to training, so many people think they can do it alone. That somehow, the network effect no longer applies.
Perhaps it’s the captivating image of them alone in a poorly equipped and otherwise abandoned building gym that makes them believe that, when it comes to fitness, going it alone is what makes it authentic and hardcore and, perhaps ultimately, more effective.
That they don’t need the training partners, or the right gym environment, or the support of coaches, or the expertise of programmers in order to succeed.
The truth is, no method or environment guarantees results. In the words of Captain Jean-Luc Picard, when it comes to training, it is possible to commit no errors and still lose. That is not weakness, that is life.
And that is because training - even when done at the highest level - only takes up a fraction of your weekly hours. And for us mere mortals, it’s likely three to four hours per week at best. Which leaves plenty of time to fuck things up at the dinner table or the bar or wherever else you unspool all the good things you’ve done in the squat rack.
But that isn’t the argument here. Rather, all things being equal, you will have a much more effective (and, dare I say, joyful) experience if you extend the network effect to your training. If you put yourself in an environment of supportive coaches, like-minded training partners and expert programmers you are dramatically more likely to succeed.
I know more about strength training than most. I’ve dedicated my career to helping people through meaningful exercise. I would train even if I was stranded on a desert island with only boulders and driftwood for equipment.
But yet I find that I still gravitate towards training in groups in dynamic environments while following a program (which, quite honestly, I often design and have no desire to do). Because having that company and community makes the experience better and always yields greater workouts and results.
The romanticism of the lone trainee isn’t the only reason people often avoid training in community. Often, it is embarrassment. They feel like they must be too far behind to keep up with or contribute to the group.
And I understand this sentiment but I am here to tell you, nothing could be further from the truth. Our facility (and others like it) exist to support people who are exactly in this position. In fact, we would cease to operate if everyone out there was confident in the training process.
Ultimately, I am here to be the Tabby to your Stephen King. To take your balled up, half-hearted idea of a successful training strategy out of the trash, smooth it out on the table, show you what is possible and put you in the right environment to get you there.
For you, it’s the best that I can do.