I just left the hospital five minutes ago.
My wife, Mom, and son were in the lobby waiting for me.
I went to get the car so I could drive us all home.
Luckily, the address of the parking garage was printed on the ticket (thank God I still had the ticket!), because in the rush of emotions and adrenaline that accompanied our arrival to the hospital, I could only half remember where I left the car.
But I found it. And ten minutes later I pulled back up to the hospital entrance and loaded my wife and three-day-old son into the car for our first ride as a family and our first trip back to our home.
I remember driving slowly. Slower than usual.
I remember the weight of it. The silence. The ridiculous amount of blinking I did. And I remember that “Good Time” by Carly Rae Jepsen and Owl City was playing on the radio.
Now I can’t hear that song without thinking about my son and that ride.
I could have sworn that was five minutes ago.
But the calendar says otherwise.
It's telling me that drive actually happened thirteen years ago. My son just turned thirteen.
Time doesn’t ask if you’re paying attention.
It doesn’t check to see if you’ve made that change you keep saying you’re going to make.
It doesn’t care if your plan got thrown off, or your schedule got full, or if you just couldn’t get your head in the game.
It just moves.
And one day, you’re not where you were… but you’re not where you hoped you’d be either. You’re just... stuck between stations on the car radio. Wondering how long it's been.
If you’ve ever thought “I’ll get serious next week” or “this isn’t the right time” or “I'll just wait until life calms down,” I’ve got bad news:
Life doesn’t calm down.
But I’ve also got good news:
You don’t need it to.
You don’t need perfect conditions.
In fact, you are better off starting when things aren’t perfect. Because things aren’t going to be smooth and perfect most of the time. There’s always unexpected work travel or a kid that gets sick or a friend who unexpectedly needs you. So if you can figure out how to get your training in when things are the most chaotic, you’ll set yourself up for truly big success when things feel more “normal”.
We’ve talked about this here before, but when it comes to training, you don’t need perfect.
Without question you want to set things up so that you are getting the most effective and efficient training every time you step in the gym. That’s just smart.
But consistent training that isn’t optimal beats the crap out of the perfect program that is never performed.
The person who has been winging it but shows up and trains hard every week for thirteen years - they end up in pretty good shape.
And perhaps that is the lesson to be learned here.
Because while I can swear its been 5 minutes since I left that hospital lobby to pick up my wife and son, it also feels like 100 years. Like I can’t remember life without him. He is just a part of me now.
Of course, you will never have a connection to training or fitness in the same way you do to your family (or perhaps you shouldn’t) but you should have a connection.
But it’s also okay for your training to feel like it’s part of you. Like it’s who you are. In fact, I’d say that’s ideal.
And maybe, if you stick with it long enough — through the chaos, the imperfect days, the skipped meals and short nights — maybe one day you’ll look back and realize…
It’s been thirteen years. And it only felt like five minutes.
Apologies to one of my absolute writing mentors Shelley Lanman for the gratuitous use of ellipses on this blog.
She was my Creative Director at one of the ad agencies I used to work at and she absolutely (and correctly) hated the uses of ellipses and always discouraged me from using them.
Shelly passed away years ago from some bullshit cancer way too soon. She still had a husband and three small children at the time. And her passing makes me realize how lucky I am to still be sticking around and be able to see my son grow up.
Sorry for the ellipses, Shelley. I tried my best but I think they made sense here.